Intimacy, Lockdown, and Sex Toys

Everybody loves sex. Being intimate with someone/s and just letting your bodies tango in all the right places is a thrill that we crave – especially when it isn’t allowed.

It’s 2021, and you’d think the world would’ve beaten the Covid-19 pandemic by now, but it seems that the virus is adamant about keeping us social distancing for a little bit longer. As if it wasn’t challenging enough before to date or maintain relationships, the travel and health restrictions are like festival flags that look so fun but also so dangerous. 

What a challenge it is to stay intimate during a lockdown, right?

INTIMACY IN THE PANDEMIC

Since the outbreak in 2020, we’ve been told to meet other people with caution or, ideally, not at all. Pre-Covid Intimacy used to be a magical experience that any sexually active creature could enjoy almost 24/7. You could find a connection through popular dating apps/sites like Foxtail or even organically at your favorite bar or café. Oh, how we miss the little things that meant we’re alive! Remember when we used to anticipate being picked up for a date? Snuggling under the covers with Netflix on? Talking about our fears and dreams in the back of a pick-up truck beneath the stars? Getting it on after a nightcap? Good times, right? 

See, Intimacy isn’t always about sex, though, but also about the connection we have with people. But with touching off the table, we physical touch lovers are at a loss. Whoever thought that these simple things could be taken away by a flu-like virus? 

As the borders shut down, venturing to and fro countries, cities, and even neighborhoods have become a health hazard. Seeing people became impossible and, honestly, just not worth it when we know we can stick it out, right?

 Alas, not everyone can be (temporarily) chaste. 

LOCKDOWN BLUES

Not all hope is lost, though! Thanks to the advances in technology and the gift of the internet, connecting with people over long distances wasn’t really an issue compared to hooking up during the lockdown. Conversations can spark with a click of a button; meanwhile, love-making sputtered out before it even ignited. The lockdown actually killed off a lot of relationships – long-term or budding. It’s either due to the excessive closeness of being stuck together or the physical distance of home quarantine. Covid-19 became an effective heartbreaker for some but a relationship mender to others. People who lived with their significant others never really experienced the kind of sexual drought as the general populace did – even if they ended up breaking up. Those who lived alone had to get creative… or panic buy sex toys like the rest of us.

SEX TOYS ON THE RISE

Ah, yes, the notorious items that are sex toys. The replacement for sexually unsatisfying partners and lack of intimacy, just kidding. Many misconceptions surround sex toys that people think it’s the end of a relationship when you own one. But in reality, sex toys are windows to spicier sex life; it’s the vanguard of other kinks. Everyone loves sex, and sex involves kink. Seeing as everyone has a kink, the fear of not getting some in isolation became too strong that it inevitably pushed those on the brink to join this bandwagon. But that’s okay, sexual exploration and discovery are all part of the fun, and we do not judge here. 

According to a psychosexual health journal, online sales for sex dolls, sex toys, and lingerie have skyrocketed more than 100% of their usual sales. This phenomenon was observed in many countries, i.e., Australia, the UK, Denmark, France, Spain, India, et cetera. This just confirms that people value sexual health as they value their mental health. It’s difficult to go on living without that feeling of release only sex can provide. Still, with the current situation, we had to go to try alternatives to satisfy our bodily cravings. 

The possession of sex toys empowered people to use their imaginations by feeding the senses either via online sessions with partners from different locales or a shared experience in private quarters, through exploration of self-pleasure, or even role-play fantasies. While frenzied to restock pantries for a hibernation-like event, many people also prioritized equipping themselves with basic sex items. Hence, the notion that all types of Intimacy, no matter its form, is valued and needed for overall healthy well-being. 

CONCLUSION

We can all agree that we have all taken hits because of the lockdown experience. Our relationships with the world, other people, and ourselves have changed forever. With the lockdown, the rise of conversations around sex toys have increased. It’s not just something that only kinky people enjoy but it’s something everyone can enjoy. Being open about our intimate needs – sexual, emotional, mental, and spiritual – is a liberating experience no matter the setting.

Currently, mass vaccination drives around that world have helped open a crevice of freedom to roam and mingle, yet the potential of contracting Covid-19 is still a reality of concern.

Making do with the tools and sex toys afforded to satiate our libidos, Intimacy – in all its glory – will have to wait for more favorable circumstances. 

Haven’t had enough? You can read more blog posts on Foxtail’s Kinky Blog! You’ll be sure to find tips on how to quench every desire!  

Swingers Party: How to Enjoy Your First Sex Party

You arrive with some food and drink to share. You go around greeting people you know and meeting new people while relaxing with food and drink. The host lays out basic rules, such as where sex is permitted and where it is not (customarily explained before arrival), no unwanted force, and respect for any rules laid out by the participants prior, during, and after sexual interaction. Condoms are usually provided by the host, but you can bring your own if you prefer. Safe sex is negotiated between the parties involved.

If you have a partner, you will have your own pre-agreed-upon comfort level rules about what is and isn’t acceptable to do while at the party. When you become attracted to a person or people, you discuss (in whatever level of detail you want) what you want to happen next and during your interaction. Have a good time! When you’re ready to leave, you thank your host and either return home or continue on to other delights.

Does this sound like fun? Keep reading

Swinger party Los Angeles

What is a Swingers Party?

Few people realize that swinging as a fad in America began in the 1950s when Air Force officers in California started swapping wives. Since then, it has been more common among those 35+ years old, behind closed doors. It has become more mainstream with younger crowds, with the push being driven by women looking to call the shots. Swinger parties have become so typical there are even websites where people host swinger parties.

A swingers party is meant for individuals with a desire to: watch others have sex, swap partners (soft or full swap), be cuckolded, play in an orgy, and so much more. It’s a lower risk, higher adrenaline encounter. Low risk since the attendance is kept private and sex takes place around other respectful adults. High adrenaline, as things can move very fast!

Those familiar with the swinging world refer to it as the “Lifestyle.” People in the lifestyle typically meet online before meeting in person. They meet randomly at sex parties to avoid the possibility of an affair. Sex parties can take place at a designated sex party location or in a private area of residence. The rules are pretty standard, with consent being the highest priority.

Rules at a Swinger Party

NO means “NO” Especially At a Sex Party

This rule is paramount for obvious reasons, this is the most important of the swinger rules. If someone is violated at a party, word will travel fast. This can lead to lawsuits, “being canceled,” violence, or worse. Typically party-goers want to avoid any negativity or hostility, so it’s best to ask.

Tip: If it’s not a FUCK YES!!! It’s a Hell No.

I’ve often seen guys asking for something and being met with kind rejection only to keep pushing. Sex parties are not the place to push what you want on to others. Check your ego and pride at the door. We’re all here to have a good time!

Swinger parties are also no a place for the meek. Owning your “NO” at a sex party is your most valuable tool. Subtitles can be missed when drinks and genitals are on the table (literally lol). Practice saying and receiving no with a friend or partner before attending to get you in the habit of saying it and hearing it, and you’ll be fine.

Remember, you can always say NO. There’s never a reason to be ashamed or worried. Swinger parties are meant to be the fun, sexy experience you’re imagining. You may not get exactly what you want every time, but if you abide by the NO, you’ll be invited again.

Aggressive behavior

This rule closely follows the law, “NO means NO.” Remember that not everyone likes rough sex. Get a feel for your partner and their desires. Do not use violence if you do not get consent in advance. Do not force your partner to do anything. Even if you previously had rough sexual intercourse with a particular individual, this does not mean that the person is ready for this again. Remember, any sexual manifestations depend on the mood of the person.

Always be courteous and polite. Getting upset or “butthurt” because you were asked to leave is a sign of not being able to take rejection.

It is strictly forbidden to force or pressure someone.
Proceed only by mutual agreement!

Age limits

Anyone attending a sex party must be 18 years or older. Most swing party organizers require people over the age of 21. As we said above, consent is essential here. Swing party members must be able to legally to consent. If you’re unsure, don’t risk it. There are more fish in the orgy ??.

Why Do You Want to Attend Swing Parties?

That’s precisely what you should ask yourself before joining swinger parties. Are you doing this for yourself or to please someone else. If it’s later, you may cause yourself lasting psychological harm. If you are looking to test the waters, attend as a voyeur and clarify that you are not there to play.

Do not surprise your partner by inviting them to swinger parties. If you do this, they may act without having proper time to mentally prepare. If they don’t have any interest, unfortunately, you may have to find a new partner or come to an agreement. This may be tough to hear, but there’s no way around it. If they are working toward it, don’t bring it up often, as it can make it seem like a condition of your affections. They may not want to experience the jealously or thoughts of you and another or vice versa.

Compersion is the quality found in people who can find pleasure in watching their partner receive pleasure. This quality is scarce. It can be developed, but it will require work and compromise on both sides. Yes, if you want them to do it, be prepared to do the same for them.

A butt for a butt as they say ?.

Do not Get Entangled with other Couples

I can’t emphasize this enough. Do not get entangled with other people in the group party. Do not try to connect with someone without speaking to their partner. Unless you are building a friendship naturally, leave the party at the party.

These are often mistakes of amateur swingers who have shown the so-called “Spark of Love.” This leads to feuds in a sex party, and it can really get ugly, especially if there are drugs involved. Remember, relationships can be fragile, don’t be a homewrecker.

If you and your partner are looking to make more profound relationships. Consider going on a “couple’s date.” This will give everyone the chance to get to know each other and establish boundaries. When trust is established, there’s no limit to where things can go!

Phones

Never pull out your phone! If you must use your phone, go to the bathroom. By nature, these parties are private. Respect everyone’s privacy, and don’t bring your phone out. Some places will even take your phone and smash it. Leave the party, take your call and come back.

Alcohol

On the one hand, alcohol in moderation promotes relaxation and extra excitement. However, it is worth remembering that alcohol consumed more than your average amount can have the opposite effect. Alcohol is a depressant, after all.

Drink as much as you should, not as much as you could.

Drugs

I strongly advise against using drugs at swing parties.

Firstly, you can run into severe problems with the authorities. Second, you can’t consent thoughtfully, which will have lasting consequences. Last, being in a state of drug intoxication will not give you the whole experience of swinging.

If a swinger party is boring, leave. Save your drugs for a better party.

Dress Code

Most swinger Parties have a theme that the organizers decide in advance. Typically, it’s some kind of clothing-based themes like a toga or costume party.

If this information is not specified, contact the event organizer and clarify all your questions. Anyway, it would be best if you were neatly dressed and well-groomed.

Prostitution

The swing is an exchange of partners by mutual agreement. Never offer party members sex with your partner for money. You will be instantly removed from the sex party and receive a ban from all future events.

Hygiene

Always be clean and have a pleasant appearance. Wear a small amount of perfume or non at all; some are allergic or sensitive to strong scents.

Wear deodorant, be squeaky clean, and brush your teeth right. You can also bring your own sex toys and don’t forget about condoms. Safety should come first.

Respect

Do not criticize, try to change, or judge anyone. Don’t judge. #DontYuckMyYum as we say.

You should discuss desires and preferences with your partner in advance. Go into the party with a game plan of what to look for and work as a team. Swinger parties can be an actual test of the strength of a relationship.

What You Need to Know About Swinging

Experienced swing couples believe that sharing intimate acts and fantasies with a partner has a colossal arousal power. Swinging with others can bring partners closer together thru compersion and fulfillment. Sex parties are a natural and enjoyable way to prevent sneaky infidelity and subsequent breakup.

Swinging is not the same as Kink. The two are close neighbors but often don’t mix. Bring toys to play with your partner, but no one is looking to be dominated or worshiped more often than not. They are there to F*#k (Fuck).

The Bottom Line

Have sex as much as you want, enjoy it, get the most out of it. Everyone should have fun, so stick to the above rules, and the world of sexual happiness will open for you. Having sex with your loved one and enjoying other partners is much better than infidelity. I recommend that you try this kind of sex and get an unforgettable experience. Discover parties going on this week on Foxtail. You will want more!