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Increased Libido: Why do I have a high sex drive? And ways to control it.

sex party

There is no definition of ‘normal’ sexual drives such as libido or sexuality. There is a range of libido levels, from having no desire to have sex to engaging in sexual activities regularly. High sexual intensity does not cause problems in people; it only affects their thoughts. Alternatively, someone who suffers from excessive sex driving may want to improve it for daily living tasks. People desire sex at various stages of their lives. If a person wishes to reproduce or has a desire for sexual activity, they must feel a sense of normalcy that anyone can feel.

Changes in libido, or sexual drive, are normal. However, having a high sex drive can become a problem if it interferes with daily functioning.

It is important to note that there is no such thing as a “normal” sex drive, and what one person considers to be a high sex drive may appear normal to another.

Many people are interested in their sexual drive. Changes in hormone levels, your age, or an increase in exercise may all contribute to a high sex drive. Reduced stress or discontinuation of certain medications can also result in increased libido. This article will look at some of the underlying causes of a high sex drive and offer advice on controlling or reducing it…and if interested, raising it even more!

What exactly is a sex drive?

Sex drive, also known as libido, is a desire for sexual activity that stems
from the fundamental biological need to reproduce.
It is a natural feeling that anyone can have, whether they want to reproduce or
Libido levels range from having no desire for sex to wanting to engage in
sexual activity frequently.

Scientists are still baffled as to why sex drive occurs. Other factors, both
social and mental, contribute to the development of my libido. Hormones play a
role, but it’s not always clear how much of a difference they make between men
and women.

Is there such a thing as “normal” sexual desire?

Some people may want sex once a day, while others may not think about it at
all. A variety of factors causes individual differences. Even minor differences
in nature can have a positive impact. Some people, for example, have more
testosterone than others, which may affect their sex driving. Some males have
higher levels of testosterone, which influences their sexuality. These side
effects have an impact on their libido as well.

Your sexual drive is complicated, and there is no such thing as normal when it
comes to libido. While some people crave sex several times per day, others may
not think about it at all.
Many personal differences exist due to a variety of factors ranging from
culture to diet, from exercise to mental health, and age. Simple biological
differences can also have an impact. Some men, for example, have more
testosterone than others, which may influence their sexual drive.

increased sexual desire
increased sexual desire

What can cause a sudden increase in libido?

Do you have a high sexual appetite? There are a few common reasons for this:

  • Your stress levels have decreased.

This is a significant one. “If you’re in a low-stress period, your libido will likely increase,”

That, is why “vacation sex” is so popular.

Your mental health is better than it has ever been.

Being raised in a sexually-repressive household or religion, according to clinical sex counselor Eric M. Garrison, author of “Mastering Multiple Position Sex,” can train people to “turn off” — or at the very least disconnect from — their libido.

Going to a sex therapist, tantra therapist, or a mental health professional to work through this shame can result in these people reconnecting with their sexual desires.

He claims that this can make people feel as if their sex drive is increased.

  • You’re having a good time.

The more you have (good) sex, the more your body craves it, thanks to hormones.

So, if you’ve recently started sleeping with someone (or a new sex toy!) who makes you happy, it’s natural to crave sex more frequently.

  • You’ve been working out more.

“Some people find that when they exercise regularly, they want sex more often,”

  • This could be attributed to a number of factors, including:
  • increased self-assurance
  • stress reduction
  • better sleep
  • You changed or discontinued certain medications.

Certain medications, such as antidepressants, SSRIs, birth control pills, and beta-blockers (to name a few), have been shown to suppress libido.

Finally, according to some doctors, adjusting to these medications can result in an increase in libido.

And so can discontinuing these medications. A friendly reminder: do not discontinue any medication without first consulting with your healthcare provider!

  • You’ve reached the “horny” stage of your menstrual cycle.

Most menstruating women have a “horny” phase of their cycle, which occurs just before, during, or after ovulation.

So, if you or your partner is ravenous a few times a month, blame it on the hormones!

Is having a high libido a good thing?

There is no universal “normal” when it comes to sex drive. Regardless of gender, the desire for sex is influenced by a variety of factors other than hormones. Gender stereotypes about libido are false; in fact, people of all genders think about sex frequently, which is completely normal.

How do I deal with a high sex drive?

When one feels strong sexual urges, one can do a few things to deal with them. Talking is a good place to start, but keep in mind that your partner may not feel the same way you do. Keep in mind that not all of those desires must be satisfied; it is sex. Finding’satisfactory sex’ can also help to reduce a constant desire – and there are ways to meet people for casual sex that may help you scratch that itch. Consult a doctor if you have hypersexual or sexual issues. If you require assistance, they will be able to refer you to an advisor.

Some strategies may be useful for anyone concerned that their sex drive is excessive and needs to be addressed.

Some things to try to reduce sex drive are as follows:

  1. Consider talking therapy.

If a person’s high sex drive makes them unhappy, a counselor can help them explore their sex-related thoughts, feelings, and desires.

They can assist the individual in determining how to manage their sexual desire and any issues that may arise due to it.

  • Experiment with distraction.

Sexual activities, whether with a partner or through masturbation, will keep the desire for more sex alive. So, if a person wants to reduce their sex drive, it may be worthwhile to try not to act on every sexual impulse.

Distracting the mind with physical exercise or an absorbing task may assist a person in channeling this energy elsewhere.

  • Make time for your relationship.

People with low sex drive may misinterpret any intimate gesture made by the other as an invitation to have sex.

It might be beneficial to agree to be intimate without having sex. For example, go on a date or give each other a massage to show that you care about the other person, not so that they will agree to have sex.

  • Take into account medication.

If other strategies do not appear to be effective, it may be worthwhile to consult with a doctor about possible next steps.

Certain medications, such as antidepressants, have been shown to reduce libido. A doctor may also advise you to change or reduce any current medications if they are causing the increased arousal.

Anaphrodisiacs, such as soy, licorice, hops, and various herbs, may also be recommended by doctors to help lower libido.

desire sex in car

What exactly is hypersexuality (hypersexual drive)?

Hypersexuality, hypersexuality disorder, or sexual addiction are all terms used to describe compulsive sexual behavior. It is an excessive preoccupation with sexual fantasies, urges, or behaviors that are difficult to control, cause distress, or hurt your health, job, relationships, or other aspects of your life.

Compulsive sexual behavior can include a wide range of commonly pleasurable sexual experiences. Masturbation, cybersex, having multiple sexual partners, using pornography, or paying for sex. Compulsive sexual behavior occurs when these sexual behaviors become a major focus in your life, are difficult to control, and are disruptive or harmful to you or others.

Untreated compulsive sexual behavior, no matter what it’s called or the exact nature of the behavior can harm your self-esteem, relationships, career, health, and others. You can, however, learn to manage compulsive sexual behavior with treatment and self-help.

The lack of control over sexual urges to act can be defined as compulsive sexual conduct disorder, hypersexuality disorder, or sexual addiction. Some people with the condition have more sexual desire than others, but this does not guarantee that you will be diagnosed. CSBD is also known as sexual addiction. Other manifestations of CSBD, such as sexual remorse accompanied by feelings of guilt or disdain, are also common. People diagnosed with CSBD should be unable to control their sexual urges for at least six months.

At what age does a woman’s libido peak?

While there is no age limit for being active in bed because several factors determine sex drive, research indicates that libido in women is highest between the ages of 18 and 24. One in every four women said they had the best sex of their lives between the ages of 18 and 20.

sexual interest in women in 20s
women in 20s

Women in their twenties

If you’re between the ages of 17 and 18, you’ll be much more fertile than later in life. This makes you pickier about when you have sex, though the reason for this is unclear. According to experts, women’s desire may increase as their fertility declines in their later years.

Women’s sexual activity in their 30s and early 40s

Men between the ages of 18 and 24 were more prone to female sexual obsessions than women. They also had more sex, and they had it earlier in the relationship. Women were found to have higher intensities among groups aged 26-45 years than their younger counterparts in previous years.

Women in their fifties and beyond

As you approach menopause, your estrogen levels drop, which reduces your libido. Hot flashes, anxiety, weight gain, and sleep problems may all help to lower your mood. Inquire with your doctor about medications, hormones, lubricants, and other treatments. Inquire about medications for vaginal dryness and headaches, or contact the National Suicide Prevention Association if you’re pregnant.

When does a man’s libido peak?

Men’s sexual satisfaction peaks in their twenties, with men in their fifties coming in a close second.

Your twenties, gentlemen.

Erectile dysfunction was reported by 8% of men over the age of 30. This condition can occur unless the condition is properly treated and prevented by treatment. If you are experiencing sex-related anxiety, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or go online.

Men in their 30s and early 40s

Many men retain a strong sex drive during this period, despite the fact that testosterone gradually declines until the age of 35. The annual average decrease is around 1%. Some men may be able to digest this more quickly. Many men do this because there is work to be done and a lot of commitment required to have sex. This may have an impact on your sexual desire.

It isn’t just testosterone.

Most men with low testosterone levels have normal sexual drive, whereas men with higher values have sexual problems. Other considerations include psychological well-being and psychiatric health. Your sexes will decline as you age, but doctors are still interested in how this affects sexual drive. It may differ from person to person, but it is unknown how much testosterone is required to be aroused.

What boosts sex drive the most?

  1. Control your anxiety

Exercise and open communication can help prevent libido loss due to anxiety.

High anxiety levels are a common impediment to sexual functioning and libido in both men and women. This could be anxiety caused by life stress or anxiety related to a specific sex.

People who have a demanding work schedule, caring responsibilities, or other life stresses may experience fatigue and, as a result, have low sexual desire.

Anxiety and stress can also make it more difficult to obtain or maintain an erection, discouraging a person from having sex. According to a 2017 review of erectile dysfunction in young men, depression and anxiety can lower libido and increase sexual dysfunction.

People can do a variety of things to manage their anxiety and improve their mental health, including:

  • Observing good sleep hygiene
    • Making time for a favorite pastime
    • Regular physical activity
    • Consuming a nutritious diet
    • Working to improve interpersonal relationships
    • Consultation with a therapist
  • Many people experience a lull in sexual desire and frequency at different stages of a relationship. This could happen after being with someone for a long time or if they believe things aren’t going well in their intimate relationships.
    • Improving the relationship can boost each partner’s sex drive. This could include:
      • organizing date nights
      • doing things outside of the bedroom together
      • open communication is practiced
      • setting aside time for quality time with one another
  • Pay attention to foreplay.
    • Better sexual experiences may increase a person’s desire for sex, resulting in an increase in libido. Touching, kissing, using sex toys, and having oral sex are all ways that people can improve their sexual experiences. These actions are sometimes referred to as “outercourse” by some.
    • Foreplay may be especially important for women. According to a 2017 study, only about 18 percent of women orgasm solely through intercourse, while 33.6 percent of women report that stimulation of the clitoris is required for them to orgasm.
  • Get adequate rest.

A good night’s sleep can improve a person’s mood and energy levels, and some research has also linked sleep quality to libido.

A small-scale study conducted in 2015 on women found that getting more sleep the night before increased their sexual desire the next day. Women with longer average sleep times had higher genital arousal than women with shorter sleep times.

  • Consume a balanced diet.

A nutritious diet can help people’s libido by promoting good circulation and heart health and avoiding foods that can lower libido.

Physical and sexual functioning can be impacted by metabolic syndrome and cardiovascular disease. In addition, the polycystic ovarian syndrome can affect hormone levels, which can interfere with libido.

A diet high in vegetables, low in sugar, and high in lean proteins can aid in the prevention of libido disorders.

  • Attempt herbal remedies. There has been little research into how effective herbal remedies improve sexual function in both men and women, though some people may benefit from them.

According to a 2015 review study, there is limited but emerging evidence that the following herbal remedies may improve sexual function:

  • maca
    • Tribulus
    • gingko
    • ginseng

People should be cautious about using herbal medicines without first consulting their doctor. Some herbal medicines can interact with existing medications, and the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in the United States does not regulate them. As a result, their quality, purity, and safety are unknown.

  • Exercise on a regular basis.

Regular exercise can boost libido in a variety of ways. Regular exercise helped men cope with body image issues, low libido, and relationship changes, according to a 2015 study of men undergoing androgen deprivation therapy, which lowers testosterone levels.

According to a 2010 review of women with diabetes, exercise may help reduce diabetes-related symptoms in women. The study emphasizes that doing pelvic floor exercises may be beneficial in women who do not have diabetes.

  • Maintain a healthy body weight.

Overweight and obesity, according to some researchers, are linked to low sex drive and other factors associated with decreased fertility. This is linked to hormonal factors such as low testosterone levels.

Overweight people may also experience psychological effects such as decreased body confidence.

Maintaining a healthy body weight can improve a person’s sex drive on both a physical and psychological level. Eating a healthy diet and exercising regularly can help achieve this and increase a person’s overall energy levels.

  • Consider sex therapy.

Sexual desire is a complex phenomenon that includes both psychological and physical components. Even if a person has a physical condition that impairs libido, such as diabetes, improving one’s emotional and psychological response to sex can improve libido and sexual functioning.

Therapy is an effective way to boost low libido. Individual counseling can assist in addressing negative attitudes toward sex, self-esteem, and secondary causes of low libidos, such as depression and anxiety. Some people can benefit from relationship counseling to help them work through issues affecting their sexual desire.

Mindfulness therapy, in addition to talking therapies, may be beneficial. According to one 2014 study, just four mindfulness-based cognitive behavioral therapy sessions in a group setting improved women’s sexual desire, arousal, and satisfaction.

Search the AASECT directory for a suitable therapist in your area.

  1. Give up smoking.

Cigarette smoking can be harmful to a person’s cardiovascular system. A healthy heart is essential for sexual function.

People who used to smoke may notice an increase in their energy and sex drive after quitting.

consent in bdsm safe words
discuss sexual impulses

Discuss it.

Inquire about your partners’ needs and desires, and converse with yourself. It would be best if you were not afraid to try new things. Tell me about your feelings of fulfillment. It might even be a good idea to set aside specific times for intimacy in bed and sex.

Takeaway & Advice

Your age, hormone levels, and level of physical activity are all factors that may increase your sex drive.

While there is no such thing as a “normal” sex drive, if it is interfering with your life, work, or relationships, consider seeing a sex therapist or consulting with your doctor.

If you’ve got a high sex drive, chances are someone shares your feelings. Foxtail is a sex-positive community for meeting others who may share your kinks as well.

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