Is Swinging The Opposite of Monogamy?

Whether you can consider swinging while staying monogamous is a question that many curious or swinger couples ask. It’s a fair question because we all want to know what it takes to be a swinger. We also want to know if monogamy and swinging can somehow co-exist. After all, being a swinger does have its benefits. People might wonder about swinging as a lifestyle that is being engaged in sexual acts either for fun or pleasure. This lifestyle is highly glowering upon by many in society and by many in the law as well. However, swingers do exist, and it would not be surprising to find more swingers today than ever before.

What does it mean to be a swinger?

Swingers have different sexual desires.  Some are looking for that one serious partner, while others are open-minded about casual sex or multiple partners. For some, swinging as a lifestyle means casual flings and discreet encounters. But others are looking for a committed, long-term relationship. And this is where monogamy and swinging can get tricky.

Some swingers do choose to remain monogamous when they first start swinging. This is because the relationship with their swingers may be a secret. And the fact that their lifestyle is private keeps them from coming out and ruining the reputation of their swingers. Some may even choose to remain monogamous even though their first swinging experience did not go as planned. After all, even with a successful first date, they may still want to remain in the swinger’s bedroom.

Some swingers go the extra mile and decide to remain true to their swinging principles to stay monogamous while swinging. They feel uncomfortable with the notion of casual sex and would remain true to their primary sexual orientation. The fact is that many swinger couples will remain in their relationships because they love their partners. Enough to believe that there is more to them than a desire to procreate. Many choose to remain in their relationships because they have reached a level of intimacy. Where having sexual activity outside of the relationship would be uncomfortable. And, yes, some swingers choose to remain monogamous because they find it a more appealing trait than the forbidden thrill.

Benefits of Being a Swinger

One benefit of swinging while you are still monogamous is that you will have more options. Even if you are interested in entering into a swinging or polyamory relationship, you can still stumble upon someone with whom you can fall in love, get married, or enter into a long-term relationship. However, if you are interested in swinging to have multiple partners, monogamy is clearly not for you.



Let’s take it at face value. Can swinger couples get away with not being sexually attracted to each other? I think this is a definite yes. The fact is that society (and, by extension, pornography) has taught us that sexual attraction is a crucial aspect of a relationship. Therefore, swingers can’t stay monogamous if they feel like they need to pursue “one-night-stands” as a sexual activity. It’s just not possible.


However, we can also look at this from a more pragmatic point of view. When you think about it, having sex one time does not necessarily translate into long-term monogamy. After all, what happens when the one-night stand doesn’t pan out? And would the relationship become more than just a one-time fling if that one-night stand was something more permanent?


If you are considering entering a swinging relationship. But want to stay monogamous. You must be sure to have the desired monogamy. If not, then don’t even consider swinging at all. You must be ready to be monogamous. If you’re ready to explore swinging and you feel this type of relationship can be a way to get what you want out of your relationship. Be sure to talk with your partner about this before you do anything.


Next, honesty can be one of the key factors in determining whether you can stay in your relationship or not. Swingers often have affairs to meet new people. This often brings problems into the relationship; however, if you are honest with your partner about your intentions, your partner will be much more likely to trust you and open up to you.

Final words

Once you are ready to open the door to your swinging lifestyle, you need to consider your local laws rea adult entertainment. Some areas have strict rules about what is acceptable in their bars, and others may have no rules. Also, consider meeting someone locally. If so, then the swinger club may be the place for you to go. However, remember that there can be other adult clubs in your area that you can check out as well.


Overall, you’ll have to do your homework and evaluate your situation. It’s always best to start with the “safe” club, but if that doesn’t work, then you’ll have to move onto the “naughty” club – who knows, you may find the right swinger club for you! Swingers love to explore new sexual possibilities. The swinger lifestyle can provide a fun, exciting, intimate experience – even for the swinger who is monogamous!

Swingers Party: How to Enjoy Your First Sex Party

Kinky Relationship Tip: Talking About BDSM With Your Partner

Though wanting a kinky relationship may be a daunting subject, there are ways to talk about BDSM with your partner discreetly and comfortably. If you are a big fan of BDSM or just curious about how hardcore sex could feel. You are probably aware of how difficult it is to talk about your sexual preferences in a relationship. Especially if you have never breached the subject before. Talking about it will be something new and uncomfortable, but a step in the right direction. Additionally, if you have been exploring the world of BDSM and are already experiencing kinky fantasies talking to your significant other about your desires could be a way to further enhance your sexual desires.

What Kind of Kinky Relationship Do You Want?

First, before you talk about BDSM with your partner, you need to be clear about what exactly you are wanting for yourself. Are you looking for a casual sexual encounter between two consenting adults? Or do you want to explore the more intense side of this lifestyle, involving sadism and domination? Or what most people think of when it comes to BDSM, “bondage play”. You might be looking for to show your dominate sire and take control of your partner’s body. Many people with too much power in their vanilla life, look to be submissive in BDSM. Whatever your desires, be sure to talk about it.

If you are looking for sadism or domination, make sure you discuss if this is something you want only in the bedroom or a 24/7 dynamic. A 24/7 D/s (dom/sub) dynamic can be taxing and requires both parties to fully invest. Imagine what kind of play you would like to engage in and ask yourself ‘why’ first.

Once you know exactly what kind of kinky fantasies you have, it is time to set up a time to talk. Pick a time that’s outside of the bedroom that’s still private. Start by asking about things that excite them sexually. Hopefully, they reciprocate by asking you the same. Obviously, this would be the best time to speak about your desires.

It is critical to create a safe space to discuss your intimacy in general, especially if you are experimenting with new approaches to intimacy. Establish open communication about this subject and suggest that you discuss it regularly. While you may start with one conversation. You should expect and encourage multiple discussions and feedback as you explore new sexual curiosities and kinks. Continue to express gratitude to your partner for being open to discussing how new sexual experiences feel and make changes as needed. Be willing to compromise with your partner if they are not as open to sexual experimentation as you are. Ask frequently, “How does this feel to you?” and be willing to adjust expectations as needed. Remember that consenting to these sexual experiences is critical for all partners.

In Conclusion

Kink and BDSM have a basis of honesty and openness by nature. Talking about what you want can be daunting, but with proper preparation, your anxiety will lift. Some guides on the internet can give you more ideas and provide a deeper look into the kink you’d like to pursue. You’re always welcome to explore here at Pleasure Uncensored, or if you need to meet others who share your kinks, consider joining Foxtail. This sex-positive community has made many kinky connections possible. Good luck!