Is Swinging The Opposite of Monogamy?

Whether you can consider swinging while staying monogamous is a question that many curious or swinger couples ask. It’s a fair question because we all want to know what it takes to be a swinger. We also want to know if monogamy and swinging can somehow co-exist. After all, being a swinger does have its benefits. People might wonder about swinging as a lifestyle that is being engaged in sexual acts either for fun or pleasure. This lifestyle is highly glowering upon by many in society and by many in the law as well. However, swingers do exist, and it would not be surprising to find more swingers today than ever before.

What does it mean to be a swinger?

Swingers have different sexual desires.  Some are looking for that one serious partner, while others are open-minded about casual sex or multiple partners. For some, swinging as a lifestyle means casual flings and discreet encounters. But others are looking for a committed, long-term relationship. And this is where monogamy and swinging can get tricky.

Some swingers do choose to remain monogamous when they first start swinging. This is because the relationship with their swingers may be a secret. And the fact that their lifestyle is private keeps them from coming out and ruining the reputation of their swingers. Some may even choose to remain monogamous even though their first swinging experience did not go as planned. After all, even with a successful first date, they may still want to remain in the swinger’s bedroom.

Some swingers go the extra mile and decide to remain true to their swinging principles to stay monogamous while swinging. They feel uncomfortable with the notion of casual sex and would remain true to their primary sexual orientation. The fact is that many swinger couples will remain in their relationships because they love their partners. Enough to believe that there is more to them than a desire to procreate. Many choose to remain in their relationships because they have reached a level of intimacy. Where having sexual activity outside of the relationship would be uncomfortable. And, yes, some swingers choose to remain monogamous because they find it a more appealing trait than the forbidden thrill.

Benefits of Being a Swinger

One benefit of swinging while you are still monogamous is that you will have more options. Even if you are interested in entering into a swinging or polyamory relationship, you can still stumble upon someone with whom you can fall in love, get married, or enter into a long-term relationship. However, if you are interested in swinging to have multiple partners, monogamy is clearly not for you.



Let’s take it at face value. Can swinger couples get away with not being sexually attracted to each other? I think this is a definite yes. The fact is that society (and, by extension, pornography) has taught us that sexual attraction is a crucial aspect of a relationship. Therefore, swingers can’t stay monogamous if they feel like they need to pursue “one-night-stands” as a sexual activity. It’s just not possible.


However, we can also look at this from a more pragmatic point of view. When you think about it, having sex one time does not necessarily translate into long-term monogamy. After all, what happens when the one-night stand doesn’t pan out? And would the relationship become more than just a one-time fling if that one-night stand was something more permanent?


If you are considering entering a swinging relationship. But want to stay monogamous. You must be sure to have the desired monogamy. If not, then don’t even consider swinging at all. You must be ready to be monogamous. If you’re ready to explore swinging and you feel this type of relationship can be a way to get what you want out of your relationship. Be sure to talk with your partner about this before you do anything.


Next, honesty can be one of the key factors in determining whether you can stay in your relationship or not. Swingers often have affairs to meet new people. This often brings problems into the relationship; however, if you are honest with your partner about your intentions, your partner will be much more likely to trust you and open up to you.

Final words

Once you are ready to open the door to your swinging lifestyle, you need to consider your local laws rea adult entertainment. Some areas have strict rules about what is acceptable in their bars, and others may have no rules. Also, consider meeting someone locally. If so, then the swinger club may be the place for you to go. However, remember that there can be other adult clubs in your area that you can check out as well.


Overall, you’ll have to do your homework and evaluate your situation. It’s always best to start with the “safe” club, but if that doesn’t work, then you’ll have to move onto the “naughty” club – who knows, you may find the right swinger club for you! Swingers love to explore new sexual possibilities. The swinger lifestyle can provide a fun, exciting, intimate experience – even for the swinger who is monogamous!

Swingers Party: How to Enjoy Your First Sex Party

Telltale Signs You Might Be A Swinger

Swingers battle lots of stigmas and stereotypes associated with the lifestyle. This is why many swingers keep their choices private. So someone who is swinger-curious might be at a loss with who to ask about the lifestyle. Never fear! Foxtail is here to help you out with your sexual quandary. If you are curious about swinging and are wondering whether you have it you to try it, keep reading.

Swingers love a themed party. 

Once you’re in the lifestyle, you can always find parties and events where swingers gather to socialize, tell juicy tales of adventure, find new partners, and chat about their fetishes. All while under a blacklight getting glow painted or wearing head to toe lace. This is very common, and most swingers would probably describe the parties as fun and enjoyable. Swingers love a good themed event to dress sexy for (or get naked for). If you go to just one or two of these parties, you will probably realize how much they are all about relaxation, sharing, and sex-positive communication while expressing yourself and just plain feeling cute. Compliments abound at swinger parties. You’ll see what I mean. :)

Fantasies about group sex.

Monogamy is lovely, but so are non-traditional relationship structures! It is okay if you want to have sex with other people, experience group sex, see your partner have sex with someone else, or explore your sexual curiosity! You can have all of those fantasies and still be committed to your relationship. Many couples say that swinging further enhances their intimacy and happiness together. Non-traditional, am I right?

Are you truly a swinger or is it just fantasy?

Some people wonder whether they can be swingers or if they’re just having sexual fantasies that are meant to stay in their heads, not their beds. The truth is that fantasies and feelings are just part of being human and sexual development. Even though you can have such fantasies never act on them, it does not mean that they are not real!

Feelings, especially about sex, can sometimes develop into actions. First, try talking about it with your partner. Discuss how it might feel to explore your relationship, share the fantasy with them. Let them know you don’t need to act on it yet, you’re just curious about the wet dream! Creating a safe space to explore your fantasy together will help you figure out if it’s really right for your relationship.

Final Thoughts

Truly discovering the swinger in you can be achieved by sharing your swinger fantasies with your partner and looking for others within the swinging community to chat with. You can find lots of swinging cuties in our sex-positive community here.

Visit our blog today to explore more. Good or bad, leave a comment below. We appreciate your thoughts.

Swinging And Why It Is Exciting

Group sex has been practised for as long as humans have been sexing and is gaining more mainstream popularity in the 21st century. It is instrumental in connecting people with the same sexual desires. There are many reasons why swinging is a fun lifestyle choice. Couples try more open relationships to add adventure into their relationship, and couples who have lost their electricity might try to add more excitement and variety to their relationship. Swingers are just a fun and exciting group of people.

Couples or individuals may choose this lifestyle for its many benefits. It can be helpful to understand these benefits before deciding to get involved in the lifestyle. Swinging is not a new lifestyle. Many swingers have been together for decades or even longer. There are some advantages to dating couples and long-term swingers, and let me share those with you now. Swingers have been able to build solid and committed relationships because they work on these things. This lifestyle is a positive step forward in the direction of accepting one’s sexuality, human desires and create fulfilling relationships.

​​​Pros of Swinging​​

Let’s start with the pros of swinging. One advantage is that it allows the couple to enjoy the trust in their relationship and feel free. Swinging creates situations for couples to explore sexually with other couples, they are not bound by the usual rules of monogamy. This helps many people feel a sense of freedom and authenticity. In this day and age, many couples are no longer concerned with “owning” a person through typical monogamy. Instead, many happy couples are focused on honouring one another’s individuality within the union by participating in swinging and other sexual exploration.

Another advantage of swinging is that it allows for the exploration of attraction and sexuality. Many women married to men are interested in exploring their bi-curious fantasies after years of marriage with their husbands. The same can go for the husband as well!

Swinging is also just plain fun Swinger parties and lifestyle events are full of interesting people from all walks of life. You might be surprised who’s into the lifestyle once you begin to make friends in the community. There is no one stereotype of swinger. Swinger parties are also an opportunity for creative expression. Many parties are themed giving people a chance to dress up in sexy lingerie or the slutty costumes of their choice. No need to wait for Halloween!!

Cons of Swinging

Now, let’s talk about the cons of swinging. Swingers can’t just jump into it without giving it much thought. The only potential con for some people is that it takes time and effort between you and your partner to be involved in the swinger lifestyle. Swingers need to have a genuine desire to be in an open relationship paired with a commitment to effective communication in the relationship. It is common for feelings of jealousy to arise at first and to feel some different strange emotions from seeing your partner play with others. You can start slow and just observe others as you get more comfortable with the idea. If the lifestyle is for you, you will find yourself fantasizing about it and becoming more aroused by the idea of exploring with others sexually.

Remember there are different ways to swing! Like all kink activities, swinging requires consent. So, you and your partner decide what the limits are and can change them as you go. For example, at first, you can decide to “soft-swap” = playing with others without penetration, focusing on kissing, caressing, fondling and touching. Then you can move to a full swap = full penetration. Some couples also enjoy exploring their bi-curiosity while the other partners watch.

People who decide to adopt this lifestyle often find that it is fun for it brings people together. It helps couples connect, and build even more intimacy than before.

Why Do Couple Love This Lifestyle?

People swing because they feel happiness and fulfilment sharing in sexual experiences with others. Swingers come in different variations. Some are exploring in casual relationships, while others have been in their relationship for decades. Many swingers feel a sense of freedom and truly being themselves when they are at swinger parties and hanging out with their community.

Now to make your swinger’s party even more fun, why not use sex toys? According to credible research, sex toys can enhance pleasure and even improve bladder control. Don’t be shy to bring your sex toys to the party!!

The Bottom Line

Now that you understand why people may or may not try swinging, hopefully, you now understand why swingers choose their alternative lifestyle. They understand the effort and energy the lifestyle requires, but also the rewards. In summary, the advantages are endless. You must be ready to make a lifestyle change and commit to growth if you are going to start swinging!

So whether it’s romance or fetish that excites you, one thing’s for sure- swinging will blow your mind! Meet swingers in your area by joining our sex-positive community here. Visit our blog and read more interesting kinky stuff. Good or bad, we would love to hear your thoughts.

Kinky Relationship Tip: Talking About BDSM With Your Partner

Though wanting a kinky relationship may be a daunting subject, there are ways to talk about BDSM with your partner discreetly and comfortably. If you are a big fan of BDSM or just curious about how hardcore sex could feel. You are probably aware of how difficult it is to talk about your sexual preferences in a relationship. Especially if you have never breached the subject before. Talking about it will be something new and uncomfortable, but a step in the right direction. Additionally, if you have been exploring the world of BDSM and are already experiencing kinky fantasies talking to your significant other about your desires could be a way to further enhance your sexual desires.

What Kind of Kinky Relationship Do You Want?

First, before you talk about BDSM with your partner, you need to be clear about what exactly you are wanting for yourself. Are you looking for a casual sexual encounter between two consenting adults? Or do you want to explore the more intense side of this lifestyle, involving sadism and domination? Or what most people think of when it comes to BDSM, “bondage play”. You might be looking for to show your dominate sire and take control of your partner’s body. Many people with too much power in their vanilla life, look to be submissive in BDSM. Whatever your desires, be sure to talk about it.

If you are looking for sadism or domination, make sure you discuss if this is something you want only in the bedroom or a 24/7 dynamic. A 24/7 D/s (dom/sub) dynamic can be taxing and requires both parties to fully invest. Imagine what kind of play you would like to engage in and ask yourself ‘why’ first.

Once you know exactly what kind of kinky fantasies you have, it is time to set up a time to talk. Pick a time that’s outside of the bedroom that’s still private. Start by asking about things that excite them sexually. Hopefully, they reciprocate by asking you the same. Obviously, this would be the best time to speak about your desires.

It is critical to create a safe space to discuss your intimacy in general, especially if you are experimenting with new approaches to intimacy. Establish open communication about this subject and suggest that you discuss it regularly. While you may start with one conversation. You should expect and encourage multiple discussions and feedback as you explore new sexual curiosities and kinks. Continue to express gratitude to your partner for being open to discussing how new sexual experiences feel and make changes as needed. Be willing to compromise with your partner if they are not as open to sexual experimentation as you are. Ask frequently, “How does this feel to you?” and be willing to adjust expectations as needed. Remember that consenting to these sexual experiences is critical for all partners.

In Conclusion

Kink and BDSM have a basis of honesty and openness by nature. Talking about what you want can be daunting, but with proper preparation, your anxiety will lift. Some guides on the internet can give you more ideas and provide a deeper look into the kink you’d like to pursue. You’re always welcome to explore here at Pleasure Uncensored, or if you need to meet others who share your kinks, consider joining Foxtail. This sex-positive community has made many kinky connections possible. Good luck!