Fetishes can take on various forms, depending on what the person fantasizes about. People come in all shapes and sizes and so do their kinks! Bondage, role-play, impact play, and feet are all some of the most commonly practiced fetishes you’ve probably already encountered. What about voyeurism?
If you are interested in observing unsuspecting people while they undress and have sex, then you are in the right place! Read our post on how to do it properly.
What is Voyeurism?
”I’ll bet you that nine out of ten people if they see a woman across the courtyard undressing for bed, or even a man puttering around in his room, will stay and look; no one turns away and says, ‘It’s none of my business.’ They could pull down the blinds, but they never do. They stand there and look.” – Alfred Hitchcock.
Voyeurism is a paraphilia, which according to the Journal of Sex Research, is one of the most common sexual interests. But why is a paraphilia that common?
Well, in general, people are more interested in watching than being watched. You prefer to observe intimate activities like undress, bathing, engaging in a sexual act. For a voyeur, taking an interest in people without their knowledge is called peeping. You might hear someone casually refer to a voyeur as a Peeping Tom.
In What Way do Voyeurs Have a Responsibility?
In a traditional sense, to be a voyeur means that you can watch people who undress or engage in sexual activity without their consent. But this is a problem because it can invade someone’s privacy. Here we’re promoting here the healthy side of voyeurism – with consent!
Don’t be A Creepy Peeping Tom
The act of watching someone provides a form of sexual stimulus without the fear of sexual contact or rejection. Some psychologists give explanations that this type of behavior satisfies a primal need. Still, I suggest you be upfront with your actions and stay clear from being the creepy Peeping Tom.
I also enjoy watching other people have sex at play parties and experience the thrill myself. As strange as it may seem, the best turn-on and buzz during voyeurism is when the viewer gets close to the scene without having to engage.
This might sound strange because for some the thrill comes from the unawareness of being watched, but voyeuring at play parties and BDSM events is still totally possible. Here is how you can do that…
A variety of ethical pornography videos are created with voyeurism in mind. When it comes to the privacy of this type of film, the act is all scripted, and the people involved are informed that they will be filmed. This type of scene makes it possible for you to enjoy the experience from the voyeur’s perspective without violating consent.
If you’re a more hands-on learner, role-playing with partners who gave consent is ideal. You can do this by recording a video of them doing something naughty from afar or asking them to masturbate while you watch “without them knowing.” You can choose which scenarios interest you.
A good suggestion is to eliminate ambiguity and stress to create a relaxed atmosphere where everyone can feel comfortable with boundaries and expectations.
Find a Person Who Likes to be Watched
Some sex-positive communities or organizations provide opportunities for members to explore their sexuality together or one-on-one. It is generally accepted at play parties and BDSM events that unless someone goes into a room and closes the door, it is ok to watch what they are doing. You will find at many sex clubs there are entire rooms made of glass so people can watch from afar as the sexy scene unfolds. Looking for your next event? Join our sex-positive community!
In our online community, you can find a person willing to be watched while doing any activity. So whenever they are online and have their camera on, you can spy on them while doing daily tasks. It’s all about agreement and communication with the right person.
How Can You Explore Voyeurism in your relationship?
There are many different ways to add voyeurism into your existing relationship. These are some easy places to start:
- Ask your partner if it’s ok to watch them masturbate
- If you’re in an open relationship and it feels comfortable, watch your partner having sex with someone else
- Ask your partner if it’s ok to record a video of you two (or more) having sex for you to watch later. Ask them to pretend like they do not know the camera is rolling to create the voyeur feel you’re looking for.
- Ask your partner to leave the door unlocked when they shower or bathe so you can watch “unknowingly”
Were you intrigued? How about giving it a try? Shoutout to everyone at the back, and remember consent is essential here!