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The Not So Kinky Truth About Kink

Woman with foot on kneeling mans back
Couple involved in kink

When I say kink, you say…! There’s a lot of myth with a bit of truth thrown in when talking not-so-vanilla sex. Let’s take a look at the not-so-kinky truth about Kink!

Kink Defined

Kink is frequently characterized as bizarre or unconventional sexual tastes or behavior, as well as anything that deviates from the straight and narrow. Having said that, some sexual activities fall under the “kink umbrella.”

BDSM encompasses a wide range of activities, including light paddle spanking and dominant/submissive role-playing, as well as bondage parties and pain play.

Role-playing and fantasy – Creating imagined situations are one of the most prevalent forms of kinky sex. It could be as easy as discussing a fantasy in bed, dressing up in costumes, or acting out scenes in front of strangers.

Fetishes – Fetish play is described as sexually treating a nonsexual object or bodily part sexually. Feet and shoes, leather or rubber, and diaper play are all common fetishes.

Voyeurism or exhibitionism – Voyeurism includes seeing someone undress or watching a couple have sex without their knowledge while having sex in public is considered exhibitionism. Both are very common and kinky.

Group Sex – Threesomes, sex parties, orgies, and other acts involving more than two persons are examples of group sex. Eighteen percent of men have had group sex, and even more have expressed interest in the idea.

Your Brain on Kink

Couple involved in kink

Kinky sex may improve your mental health and make you feel better. A recent study discovered that persons who engage in kinky sex are less neurotic, more outgoing, more open to new experiences, more conscientious, and less rejection-sensitive.

They also had higher subjective well-being, which could suggest one of two things: people with these features are drawn to kinky sex, or kinky sex can help you grow and acquire confidence.

Some switches (those who take on the opposite role they’re used to, such as a dom who becomes a sub) discovered that consensual BDSM can alleviate anxiety by bringing the mind to an altered state to the feeling some get when they exercise, create art, or practice yoga.

Kinks play on your body’s responses like adrenaline, which releases endorphins (feel-good hormones) when aroused. When you’re blindfolded, your body can’t feel the difference between a sharp knife and an ATM card. The surge of energy that comes from having an ATM card pulled over your body stimulates blood flow to the genitals, which increases desire.

There are numerous misconceptions about kink centered on rough sex play, defined as BDSM. This is one of the most prevalent sexual fantasies. Many people have had fantasies about bondage play or have experienced some kind of it. It’s much more common than most people realize.

Debunking the Myths

It’s no surprise that because we don’t talk about kinky sex, there are a lot of myths and misconceptions flying around. So let’s clear the air on a few common myths.

More men are interested in foot fetish play, but more women are interested in experiencing pain as part of sex – Truth: both men and women desire to explore kink equally.

One widespread misconception about those who are interested in BDSM is that they have been abused in the past. Truth: Some members of the BDSM community have been abused in the past, but the majority have NOT.

In the mainstream media, BDSM is frequently associated with abuse and violence. Some practitioners have even endured persecution and discrimination as a result of their kinks. However, the average individual who engages in kink has above-average psychological health.

According to studies, people who consistently practice BDSM have higher levels of relationship and sexual pleasure. Many people are drawn to BDSM by a need for sexual novelty. Sex is the way adults play; it allows them to disengage from reality.

Kinky How you’re Wired or Acquiure

It’s nearly impossible to pinpoint the source of a person’s kinks. The simplest answer is that it differs from person to person. Some people may be able to trace their kink back to a certain purple chair they masturbated on once, while others may have no idea why getting spanked gets them off. Does it really matter?

Who cares if you enjoy being tied up, whipped, or spanked as long as you do it in a safe, sane, and consensual manner? That’s why we call it playing.

So, instead of wondering about where a kink came from, go out and enjoy it! Couldn’t we all use a bit more play in our lives?

Kinky Requirements

When you think about kinky sex, you might imagine a leather-clad dominatrix swinging a matching whip. But all you need is your imagination and a willing partner.

There are shops for you if you like certain fetishes or want to learn more about a kink. Attempting kink requires far less equipment than, say, participating in your local volleyball club. If you want to experiment with sensory deprivation or restraints, you don’t even need blindfolds or handcuffs; a knot or pillowcase will do.

Keeping Kink Safe

Even though kinky sex has many benefits and may be what you and your partner want, there are a few things you should keep in mind to ensure that your play is fun, safe, and positive.

Consent is something that should happen before any sex act, especially if you’re trying something kinky for the first time. Communication is essential in play as well as when exploring dominant/submissive roles or potentially causing pain.

Restraints or resistance may be a part of your fantasy, which is more prevalent among women than you might imagine. Use a safe word you agree on before you become kinky to ensure you can say no in your kink while still being able to communicate no to your partner clearly. Use safe words like red light (halt) and green light (keep going).

Woman in Kinbaku harness

Everyone has various limits and bounds. While being open to new bedroom activities is fantastic, being honest about what you don’t want to explore (as in never, ever) is also vital. Discuss these hard limits with your partner frankly; there’s no need to be coy.

A huge aspect of kinky sex is combining pain and pleasure. Although some couples draw the line at mild spanking or slapping, others who explore further routes such as breast and genital pain should educate themselves so that they do not cause serious or long-term harm to tissue or nerves.

Ending with Aftercare

Even when participating in non-kinky sex, women can suffer symptoms such as anxiousness, anger, or motiveless tears. Countering this with aftercare that includes emotional connection and communication is critical, especially for BDSM.

So, don’t just go to bed after a night of kinky sex. Instead, check in with your spouse to make sure they’re okay with what just went down.

Custom Made

Custom Made Kink

Kink can appear different for everyone, and that’s fine. Exploring kink doesn’t have to start with purchasing a latex bodysuit and a whip. It might be as simple as seeing what happens try something new in the bedroom and enter a new world of sex.

The basics of kinky sex are identical to those of any strong, long-term relationship: communication, trust, understanding, and patience.

Now that you know that Kinky is not only acceptable, it’s also healthy for your mind and body! Stop wasting time… embrace your inner Kinkster!

Are you looking to get your kink on? Need a kinkster or a kinkee? Then, go to foxtail and find someone with the same thing in mind!

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