Skip to content Skip to footer

The Ultimate Kink and BDSM Dictionary

A

Abduction Play: A scenario where the bottom is forcibly restrained and often taken to another location for further play

Abrasion Play: Using something rough like sandpaper or a brush to provide stimulation

Aftercare: When a scene is over, aftercare is the emotional and physical care administered, usually by a top used to prevent more intense emotional aftereffects. Proper aftercare may be used to prevent a drop.

Age Play: When one person takes on an older role and takes on a younger role, such as a father-daughter scenario.

Algolagnia: A fetish for pain.

Allorgasmia: A fetish for fantasizing about someone other than your current partner.

Allotriorasty: A fetish for sex partners of another race, ethnicity, or nationality.

Alphmegamia: A fetish for older partners.

Androgyny: Showing characteristics of both sexes.

Anasteemaphilia: A fetish for partners who are much shorter or taller.

Animal Play: Kink where one partner, usually the submissive, pretends to be an animal often for the amusement, training, grooming, and affection of the Dominant.

Antholagnia: A fetish for the scent or sight of flowers.

Aphephilia: A fetish for human touch.

Aphephilia: A fetish for human touch.

Asexual: Someone with very little or no interest in sex and sexual activity.

Asphyxiophilia: A fetish for being suffocated or choked.

Autoandrophilia: A fetish for women who dress, behave, or look like men. 

Axillism: A fetish for armpits.

B

BDSM: Bondage Discipline Sadism MasochismAn umbrella term used to describe a sexual practice involving physical control, psychological power, or pain. It typically includes the components of bondage and discipline, domination and submission, or sadism or masochism.

Blood Play: Drawing of blood during play

Bondage: Acts involving the physical restraint of a partner

Bondage and Discipline: A BDSM practice that incorporates bondage (tying, binding, or restraining someone) and discipline (punishing a submissive partner when they break a rule).

Bottom: The person in a scene who follows the orders and receives the sensations.

Bottom Drop: A sub sometimes falls into a brief depression after an intense scene. They make themselves vulnerable during the scene and feel lonely when it ends.

Brat: A submissive who is deliberately uncooperative, topping from the bottom, pretending to be young, to elicit attention and/or punishment from their Dom/Domme.

Breath Play: A form of play in which one participant controls the breath of the other. This may include choking or asphyxiation.

Breast Expansion: A growth fetish often related to fetishes for weight gain or inflation. Enthusiasts enjoy watching breasts increase in size, often employing animation or saline injections.

Breeding: This usually means having unprotected sex to ejaculate and often includes a breeding fantasy where the role-play involves being impregnated.

Bukkake: Japanese term for a woman being showered by sperm.

Bunny:  Primarily someone who bottoms in a rope scene.

Burping Fetish: A fetish for watching, hearing, and/or smelling a person’s burp. Often related to fetishes for farting, feeding, or vore.

Butt Plug: Like a dildo but shaped slightly different, with a flared base to prevent it from entirely entering the rectum

Butch: Usually a woman, sometimes gay, who embraces and empowers the masculine energy within themselves.

C

Cage Fetish: A fetish for being confined to a small space. This often manifests as a sub locked in a cage, box, or closet. The caged sub is then teased, taunted, tortured, and/or ignored by the dom.

Camming: Sex via the internet, using webcams to view either or both directions.

Candaulism: A fetish for showing off your partner, or images of them, to others.

Cane: A thin rod used for striking commonly made of hardwood bamboo or acrylic.

Cane: A thin rod used for striking commonly made of hardwood bamboo or acrylic.

CBT: Cock and ball torture, the act of inflicting pain and torture to a guys’ genitals through many different techniques, slapping, kicking, punching, squeezing, smacking, with needles, impact, hot sauce, electricity, and more.

Cis gendered: This word originates from the Latin-derived prefix cis, meaning “to this the near side”, a girly girl or a manly man. CIS means naturally born or given gender. A male who was born with male genitals, a woman who was born with female-identified genitals.

Chastity: A form of erotic sexual denial or orgasm denial where a person has prevented access to or stimulation of their genitals sometimes by using a chastity belt.

Chemical Play: Using chemicals to produce sensation – such as tiger balm, menthol, rubbing alcohol, toothpaste, wintergreen oil, Tabasco sauce, ginger, and peppermint.

Choker: A collar is often worn in the BDSM scene to signify ownership in the same way a wedding ring does in the vanilla community. These collars are often used on subs during fetishistic acts.

Choreophilia: A fetish for dancing, or dry humping on the dance floor, to climax.

Chrematistophilia: A fetish for paying for sex or being robbed or blackmailed by a sex partner.

Chrysophilia: A fetish for gold or gold coloured objects. Similar to timophilia.

Clover Clamp: A specific type of nipple clamp with a lever mechanism to which a chain is affixed so that pulling increases pressure on the clamp.

Cock Milking: The practice of forcing a male to discharge semen through the penis through a prostate massage without experiencing a pleasurable orgasm.

Cock Ring: A device put around the penis to keep an erection.

Collar: A symbol used to represent a submissive or enslaved person is owned.

Collared: A sub committed to being owned by one particular Master or Dom / Domme.

Compersion: The opposite of jealousy, when someone is pleased to see their lover getting sexual pleasure from someone else.

Consent: Agreeing to certain acts in a BDSM scene or relationship. Practitioners believe that consent is what separates BDSM from assault.

Consent/Nonconsent: A sex act that implies rape. One partner is ‘consenting’ to act out a scene of ‘nonconsent’ aka rape.

Contract:; An arrangement that outlines the rules and structures of a BDSM relationship. It may be written or oral.

Corporal Punishment: Punishment involving pain, often through impact, as a means to discipline.

Creampie: Visuals of male ejaculate dripping, squeezed or overflowing from the vagina or ass hole in which it was ejaculated.

Crop: A think flexible tool used for striking, sometimes made from bamboo, wood or acrylic.

Cruise Party: A party set up to bring people together who may be interested in hooking up with someone for play.

Cross-Eyed Fetish: A fetish for people who are cross-eyed.

Crurophilia: A leg fetish.

Crushing Fetish: A fetish for watching small insects or animals crushed to death.

Cuckold: A fetish in which men enjoy watching their female partner have sex with other men, particularly men who are physically imposing. 

Cuck Queen: The female role who has sex with other men while her partner watches for the means of control and humiliation.

Cum Inflation: A version of inflation fetish in which a person fantasizes about pumping so much semen into a sex partner that her body bulges and swells with male ejaculate.

Cupping: A sadomasochistic play derived from a healing practice in ancient Chinese medicine. Typically the dom uses a flame to remove the oxygen from a glass cup. The cup is then quickly placed on the sub’s skin. The vacuum sucks the skin into the glass, creating a large, hickey-like mark.

Cutting Fetish: Sexual pleasure is derived from inflicting cuts on oneself or a sex partner. Related to: amputation/amputee fetish, blade play, blood fetish, body modification fetish, a medical fetish, non-con, pain play.

D

Dacryphilia: A fetish for witnessing others cry. Often a fetish of sadists who enjoy dominating subs to tears.

Denial: Refers to a few types of denial play, including orgasm denial, bathroom denial, sensory denial, and food/water denial.

Diaper Fetish: A common prop incorporated into age play or fetishes for infantilism, scat, watersports, humiliation, dominance, helplessness… Some believe this fetish develops early in life when a child associates diapers with being loved and coddled.

Dippoldism: A fetish, or paraphilia, derives pleasure from spanking or physically abusing another person.

Discipline: 1. When a dominant partner trains a submissive on fetish protocol. 2. Punishment inflicted on a submissive for disobedience.

Dog Training: When a submissive partner is treated like a dog. A common form of role-playing in BDSM.

Dominant, Dom: The partner who enjoys control in a fetishistic relationship. Synonyms: daddy, dominatrix, master, top,

Dominatrix: A female dom in a fetishistic relationship.

Dominance and submission (D/s): A term for a submissive person’s behaviours or rituals in a BDSM relationship. In D/s, one person usually has power over another.

Domme: A female dominant.

Doraphilia: A fetish for leather, fur, hair, or skin. Similar to Gypsophilia.

Drop: The physical or emotional exhaustion that takes place after a scene. Both tops and bottoms may experience a drop. Crying, feeling sad, and physically shaking are signs of a drop.

Dungeon: A location where BDSM play takes place (usually in a person’s home or at a club).

Dungeon Monitor: A person (or group of people) who supervises BDSM activities at a club or play party to ensure the acts are safe and consensual.

E

Ecotourism: A fetish for eavesdropping on others having sex.

Edging: Bringing someone close to the edge of having an orgasm and then sometimes denying the orgasm.

Edge Play: BDSM acts that are considered more intense or dangerous. Everyone’s level on the spectrum of BDSM activities is different, but edge play can involve a chance of real physical harm, such as breath play, blood, knives, and rope.

Electrophilic: A fetish for electricity, which usually involves electro-stimulation.

Emetophilia: A fetish for vomiting or watching others vomit, particularly after gagging during fellatio. Synonyms: vomit fetish.

Endytophilia: A fetish for sexual partners who remain clothed.

Ephebophilia: A paraphilia involving an attraction to teens or mid to late adolescents, generally between the ages of 15-and 19.

Eproctolagniac: A fetish for farts.

Erotographomania: A fetish for writing, particularly love poems or letters.

Erotophobia: Fear of expressing or experiencing sexual desires.

Erotophonophilia: A fetish for murder. Common among serial killers.

Exhibitionism: A fetish for being a public spectacle. This often manifests in streaking, public sex, or flashing. A common trait among porn stars.

F

Face Sitting: When the Dominant sits on the submissive’s face as part of D/s play.

Failsafe: A ‘just in case’ arrangement that allows the bottom to escape from bondage in case of emergency.

Fat Admirer/Fetish: A fetish for obesity. A broad category for several sub-fetishes: padding, inflation, stuffing, gaining, immobility, feederism, feeding fetish.

Feederism, Feedism, Feeding Fetish, Forced Feeding: A fat fetish in which pleasure is derived from feeding oneself, or another, to increase a person’s size. Related to: gaining, inflation, immobility, padding, stuffing,

Female Muscle Fetish: A fetish for muscular females. This often stems from a sub’s desire to be dominated and emasculated by a physically superior female.

Female Dominance: When a woman takes the dominant role in a BDSM relationship or scene.

Female Submission: BDSM activity in which a woman submits to a sexual partner.

Femme: A female-bodied gay woman who carries very feminine energy and can be mistaken for a straight woman as she wears feminine clothing and makeup.

Fetish: Sexual arousal resulting from a fixation with a specific act or thing. Some fetishes are so intense that a person has trouble reaching an orgasm unless he engages in, or at least fantasizes about, his fetish.

Fetish Wear: The clothing worn by those who practice BDSM (usually leather attire or other role-playing costumes).  

Fetishize: To develop a sexual obsession around an object or act.

Figging: Inserting a prepared ‘finger’ of ginger root into the anus, the burning sensations are said to bring intense pleasure.

Financial Domination: This involves a Domme controlling a sub’s finances and spending.

Fire and Ice: Play alternating between hot wax and ice or ice water.

Fire Play: Play involves using flammable liquids to create quick, fleeting contacts of flame on the skin.

Flagellation: Striking a partner via whipping, spanking, flogging, or paddling.

Flatulophilia: A fetish for farts.

Flip Flop: To serve as both the dominant and submissive partner, the top and the bottom, during a relationship or a single-sex session.

Flogger: A type of whip with multiples tails.

Food/Water Denial: A type of denial play where the dom refuses the sub food or water.

Foot Fetish: Being sexually aroused by feet, to the point where you want to stick feet in your mouth and rub your genitals on them.

Forced Orgasm: An orgasm induced on a person against their will.

Formicophilia: A fetish for insects crawling on you and your genitals. Often involves ants.

Frottage: Non-penetrative sex acts that often involve rubbing.

Frot: Usually refers to any non-penetrative sex act that involves two penises rubbing together.

Furry: One who has the fetish emetophilia, in which people wear downy costumes to either dry hump or have anonymous sex with other furries.

Furvert: One who has a fetish for pubic hair.

G

Gag: Any object used to obstruct a person’s breathing or prevent them from talking, especially during sex. A common sex toy in BDSM play.

Gagging: Most often refers to a partner choking during fellatio and deep throating.

Gaining: A fat fetish in which pleasure is derived from the idea of oneself, or another, gaining weight. Related to: feederism, feeding, feedism, inflation, immobility, padding.

Gates of Hell: Male chastity device usually made of leather or rubber and used to enclose or restrict the penis and testicles.

Gender Play: A type of BDSM play is when an individual in a scene takes on the role of the opposite gender.

Gimp: A bodysuit often with a face covering, sometimes genital openings made of plastic, PVC or leather often used for humiliation or predicament.

Glory Hole: A hole cut into a wall or partition where the penis is inserted to receive oral sex or masturbation from an anonymous person on the other side.  

Golden Showers: Showering a partner with piss.

Gerontophilia: A fetish for older partners, particularly partners who belong to an older generation.

GGG: “Good, giving, and game.” The term was coined by Dan Savage to define what we should all strive to be for our sex partners. “Think ‘good in bed,’ ‘giving equal time and equal pleasure,’ and ‘game for anything—within reason.'”

Goo Fetish: A fetish for gooey substances, which often take the form of tentacles. Related to wet and messy fetishes and sploshing. Synonyms: slime fetish.

Greek: Anal sex.

Gun Fetish: A fetish for the power embodied by guns. In practice, this fetish can manifest as women posing with, firing, or performing sex acts with guns.

Gymnophilia: A fetish for nudity.

Gynemimetophilia: A fetish for female impersonators.

H

Haematomania/Hematolagnia: A fetish for blood.

Hair Bondage: Technique where the hair is secured in a way as to limit the mobility of the head and also done for the sensation it gives.

Hamartophilia: A fetish for committing sins, as defined by your religious upbringing.

Haptephilia: A fetish for being touched.

Harmatophilia: A fetish for mistakes or rule-breaking, especially in terms of sex.

Harpaxophilia: A fetish for being robbed.

Hedonistic: Pursuit of the pleasures.

Heteroflexible: A person who identifies as primarily heterosexual but can occasionally find the same sex appealing.

Hematolagnia: a fetish for using or drinking blood sexually.

Hierophilia: A fetish for sacred or religious objects.

Hirsutophilia: A fetish for body hair.

Hodophilia: A fetish for travel.

Homilophilia: A fetish for listening to or delivering speeches or sermons.

Homoflexible: A person who identifies as primarily homosexual but can occasionally find the opposite sex appealing.

Horse: A piece of bondage furniture consisting of a plank supported by two legs on each end where a person may be bent or tied over and flogged or spanked.

Houseboy: A submissive who keeps the house clean and may just be a sexual plaything whenever the Dominant wants.

Human Furniture: Play where the submissive is directed to assume the role of furniture such as a footstool or table.

Humiliation: A type of fetish play in which the submissive partner is made to feel ashamed or degraded. It can involve anything from penis humiliation to public humiliation.

Hybristophilia: A fetish for crime and criminals, especially those criminals who gain public attention.

Hygrophilia: A fetish for body fluids, such as semen, tears, saliva, or sweat.

Hyper Fetish: A fetish for having a specific body part that is absurdly large. Variations include hyper breasts, hyper muscles, hyper testicles, hyper ass, and hyper penis. Of these, the most common are muscle, penis, and breast.

Hyphephilia: A fetish for touching skin, hair, leather, fur, or fabric.

Hypno PlayKink plays where a Dom hypnotizes a sub to make them believe they are bonded.

Hypoxphilia: A fetish for being suffocated.

I

Immobility Fetish: A fat fetish in which a person stops moving or is forced to remain stationary while increasing his caloric intake to gain weight rapidly. Related to: fat fetish, feederism, feeding, feedism, gaining, inflation, immobility, padding.

Impact Play: A type of BDSM play that involves striking the body. This can be done with whips, canes, paddles, a hand, flogger, riding crop, or other instruments.

Interrogation Play: A play scene that includes cross-examination or torture.

Impregnation Fetish: A fetish for the fantasy of impregnating a sex partner. Related to fetishes for vaginal creampies or pregnancy.

Infantilism: A fetish for dressing, acting, and being treated like an infant.

Inflation Fetish: When sexual pleasure is derived from the fantasy, or reality, of physically filling a sex partner up with various substances. Related to: air inflation, cum inflation, fat fetish, feederism, feeding, feedism, gaining, immobility, padding, stuffing,

Icolagnia: A fetish for looking at nude photos, images, or statues.

J

Japanese Bondage: A more common term is Shibari, where one partner ties the other in beautiful and intricate rope patterns as a method of restraint, but it can also be an art form.

K

Kigurumi: A fetish involving anime masks. This most often manifests as men dressing up as female anime characters.

Kinesophilia: A fetish for exercise.

Kink: A preference for the unconventional, especially for sex. Origins: From a kink in an otherwise straight rope, possibly related to the popular kink of bondage or whipping.

Kinky: Open to various sex acts that many people consider devious.

Kleptophilia: A fetish for stealing.

Klismaphilia: A fetish for enemas.

Knife Play: This involves using a knife blade to either psychologically induce an adrenaline rush by gliding a knife across the body or with actual cutting. Considered a form of edge play.

Knismolagnia, Knismo: A fetish for ticking others or being tickled.

Knissophilia: A fetish for incense.

L

Lactation Fetish: A fetish for lactating breasts. Fans of this fetish often want to nurse, be milked, or milk their partner. Often related to infantilism, pregnancy fetish, hyper breasts, breast expansion, or wet and messy fetishes.

Lactophilia: A fetish for breast milk.

Lesbian: A person attracted to people of the same gender as them. A more colloquial word for homosexual. Usually applied to women.

Lesbophilia: A fetish among men who are aroused by girl-on-girl sex. This sometimes refers to men who like to image themselves as lesbians.

Little: A partner in an ageplay relationship who takes on a younger role may enjoy behaving like and being treated like a child.

M

Macro Fetish: A fetish for giant, though not necessarily obese, sex partners. Often reserved for the realm of anime or fantasy. 

Macrogenitalism: A fetish for large genitals.

Macrophilia: A fetish for giants. This often involves the fantasy of being at the complete mercy of a much larger sex partner.

Maschalagnia: A fetish for smelling armpits.

Masochism: A fetish for being subservient to a dom who delivers physical or emotional abuse.

Master: The dominant partner in fetish play. Often a title the sub must use about the dom.

Master-Slave Relationship: An ongoing, fetishistic relationship between a dom and sub.

Male Dominance: BDSM acts when a dominant partner is a man, also called maledom.

Male Submission: BDSM activities when a submissive participant is a man, also referred to as malesub.

Masochist: An individual who likes or becomes sexually gratified by their own pain or humiliation.

Mechanophila: A fetish for machines like cars, bikes, or gadgets.

Megalophilia: A fetish for large objects.

Melolagnia: A fetish for music.

Mentor: A trusted guide or coach.

Merinthophilia: A fetish for bondage.

Metrophilia: A fetish for poetry.

Micro Fetish: A fetish for being small or engaging in sex play with small partners.

Mixophilia: A fetish for watching a partner or yourself engage in sexual activity. This fetish often involves mirrors or sex tapes.

Monster Fetish: A fetish for a wide range of monstrous creatures. Practitioners of this fetish often enjoy the fantasy of being dominated by a monster.

Morphophilia: A fetish for specific body shapes that deviate from the norm.

Mpreg: “male pregnancy”. This fantasy is often reserved for the realms of hentai pornography.

Multiple Body Parts: A fetish for sex partners with extra appendages, including breasts, orifices, penises, or limbs. Having multiple breasts may make a sex object seem hyper-female, just as multiple penises may make a male seem hyper-masculine.

Mummification: A type of bondage in which the submissive partner is completely immobilized, often by being wrapped in materials like plastic wrap or stuffed in a body bag.

Mentor: A trusted guide or coach.

Mysophilia: A fetish for dirt or filth. Often a fetish for smelling or tasting items stained by human fluids. Such items could include underwear, soiled clothes, or a used tampon.

N

Narratophilia: A fetish for dirty talk, sex stories, or having conversations about sex.

Nasophilia: A fetish for noses. This includes an attraction to a specific type of nose or even a desire to penetrate a partner’s nostrils.

Necrophilia: A fetish for human corpses.

Needle Play This involves using needles on a partner involves sticking a needle (temporarily) through a body part or erogenous zone.

Negotiation Before the commencement of a scene, people, talk outside their roles, limits, and preferences, and it can be a fun, fantasy-filled conversation. Some draw up contracts.

Non-Con: “Non-consensual” BDSM play. This may refer to rape or sex play in which either partner is aroused by the fantasy of a forced encounter.

Normophilia: A fetish for acts that do not violate laws, social norms, or religious doctrine.

Nullo: An extreme body modification fetish or paraphilia in which a person wants to have their genitals removed or nullified. 

Nyctophilia: A fetish for darkness or the night.]

O

Objectum Sexuality, Objectophilia: A broad category of fetishes in which a person is sexually aroused by a specific class of physical objects like cars, monuments, or dolls.

Ochlophilia: A fetish for being in crowds.

Oculolinctus: A fetish for licking eyeballs.

Oculophilia: A partialism fetish that centres around the eyes.

Odaxelagnia: A fetish for biting.

Odontophobia: A fetish for teeth. This can manifest in a person liking to lick teeth, leave bite marks, or extract teeth.

Olfactophilia: A fetish for smells. Usually involves body odours.

Omnisexual: Being strongly attracted to or aroused by both sexes.

Ophidicism: A fetish for reptiles.

Orgasm Denial: A fetish play in which a dom teases the sub but refuses to let him reach orgasm. This can include the use of such devices as a cock cage.

Osmolagnia: A fetish for body odours like sweat or flatulence.

Oviposition: A fetish for egg-laying. An uncommon kink, sometimes found in the furry community and usually only satisfied with employing fantasy or animation.

Ozolagnia: A fetish for strong smells.

Owned: When a submissive or slave is the consensual partner of a Master or Owner, usually in a long-term relationship.

P

Painslut: A submissive who craves pain.

Pansexual: Someone attracted to all genders and open to sex with people who identify with any orientation.

Paraphilia: Any sexual fetish that is classified as a disorder because of its extreme nature, because it is harmful, or because it violates a society’s mores or laws.

Parthenophobia: A fetish for virgins.

Partialism: A fetish for specific body parts.

Paedophilia: A fetish for sex toys, specifically dolls.

Pearl Necklace: When a man ejaculates onto the neck, and the drops resemble pearls

Pecattiphilia: A fetish for sinning, as defined by your religious upbringing.

Pegging: The practice of using a strap on dildo for penetration and usually applied from a female to a male anal act. Sitting on a peg-like butt plug with the intent of stretching the anus to facilitate anal sex.

Penis Humiliation: A fetish for receiving derogatory comments about the size and inadequacies of your penis.

Peodeiktophilia: An exhibitionistic paraphilia in which a man is aroused by exposing his penis to unsuspecting victims.

Pet Play: A submissive is treated like a loved pet, puppy or pony.

Phallophobia: A fetish for large penises.

Phobophilia: A fetish for feeling afraid.

Phygephilia: A fetish for fugitives or living as a fugitive.

Pictophilia: A fetish for watching porn. Also, when one watches so much porn of the same act or person, he develops a fetish for that act or person.

Piquerism, Picquerism: A fetish for piercing, or penetrating, another person’s skin. People with this fetish often concentrate on piercing erogenous zones.

Play: A term used to describe the BDSM acts themselves.

Play Party: A social gathering where guests can engage in BDSM activity.

Player: A person who has multiple relationships with multiple people. In the swingers community, a person is a participant in the swinging community. In the BDSM community, is it someone who is currently participating in a scene at a play party.

Plushies: Those who have emetophilia.

Plushophilia: A fetish for stuffed animals.

Podophilia: A partialism fetish that revolves around feet.

Polyiterophilia: A fetish for group sex.

Polyamory (Poly): This is considered responsible non-monogamy, where there is a loving, stable and open long term emotional and sexual relationship among more than two people. These are often committed relationships and ongoing. Sometimes all partners know about others and agree to new participants who join their partnership. In contrast, other arrangements do not require all participants to be in agreed-upon relationships with the other members.

Polysexual: Having sex with multiple partners without commitment, often done in group parties or orgies.

Pony Play: Where the submissive takes on the role of a horse, some are into dressage, being paraded around on the show, grooming, etc.

POV: An adult film acronym for point of view where the star interacts with the viewer by looking directly into the camera.

Power Exchange: A situation where two or more people consensually and voluntarily agree to assume authority and yield authority over another.

Psychosis: A fetish for being cold or with a cold partner. Also, a fetish for cold objects such as snow, ice, or a frozen glass dildo.

Pregnancy Fetish: A common fetish for fertile women who are visibly pregnant. This fantasy often focuses on swollen breasts and bellies.

Predicament Bondage: A type of bondage intended to place the bound person in an awkward, difficult, inconvenient or uncomfortable situation.

Pro-Domme/Pro Dom: A professional top and dominant who dominates and provides service in exchange for pay, which may or may not be sexual.

Protocol: A rule or rules that people practising BDSM agree to follow.

Pubephilia: A fetish for pubic hair.

Puppy: A sub who acts like a puppy for the amusement of their Dom/Domme.

Pygmalionism: A fetish for a statue or a human-like image, especially a work of one’s own creation. Often involves rubbing oneself against a statue.

Pygophilia: A fetish for butts, specifically seeing, touching, or playing with a butt.

Pyromania: A fetish for watching or setting fires.

Pyrophilia: A fetish for using fire or burning objects in sex play.

Q

Queening: When a woman (the queen you must worship) shits on your face, another term for face-sitting, often used in D/s play.

R

RACK: Risk Aware Consensual Kink are BDSM community guidelines on how to make sure everyone is aware of the dangers they consent to.

Raptophilia: Being sexually aroused by the fantasy of raping another. 

Retifism: A foot fetish that revolves around shoes.

Rhabdophilia: A fetish for being beaten, flogged, or whipped.

Robotic, Robot Fetish: A fetish for robots, particularly using robots in sex play. This fetish may become more common with the rise of increasingly automated sex dolls.

S

Sadism: A fetish for dominating a submissive partner by inflicting physical, emotional, or psychological abuse.

Sadist: A person who is sexually aroused by administering pain to himself or others.

Sadomasochism, SNM, S&M: A broad category of activities where one partner derives sexual pleasure from administering or receiving psychological or physical pain.

Safe, Sane, and Consensual (SSC): This phrase describes what the BDSM community considers ethical behaviour. Kink enthusiasts stress that activities must always be safe, sane, and consensual.

Safe Word: An agreed-upon word or phrase that a bottom, sub, or slave can say during a scene to immediately stop the activity or session. Some common safewords are “red,” “red light,” “pineapple,” “banana,” or “mercy”. “Stop” is not a common safe word.

S.A.M. In the Gay male subculture, this stands for “Stand and Model”, posing in leather, usually, Leather bar. In the scene, this stands for “Smart Ass Masochist” or “brat”  who is deliberately disobedient and disrespectful to their dominant to provoke punishment.

Safe Call: A prearranged call to let a friend know you are okay, especially in the first meeting situations

Salirophilia: A fetish for soiling the objects of one’s desire. This often manifests in a sex partner being coated in filth.

Sapiosexuality: The attraction or arousal by intelligence.

Scatophilia: A fetish for excrement.

Scene: A designated time frame where the BDSM activities or encounters occur. This can be structured with protocols and take place in a dungeon or club, at someone’s house, a hotel, or other designated location.

Scopophilia: A fetish for being a voyeur.

Scoptophilia: An exhibitionistic fetish for watching a partner or yourself engage in sexual activity.

Scotophilia: A fetish for darkness or the night.

Sensory Deprivation: Using various objects such as blindfolds, earplugs, etc., to deprive the subject of one or more senses may be used to enhance other senses such as touch or create insecurity and is often used in pushing limits or fostering increased trust.

Sensual Dom: A Dom that is sweeter and nurturing.

Service-Oriented: A person who gains pleasure from and enjoys performing services, may be sexual or nonsexual, BDSM related or not.

Service Top: A top focuses on giving the bottom what they desire over their own pleasure and interest.

Sex Magick: A sex act is done as part of a ritual with a non-sexual purpose.

Session: A date/meeting/playtime otherwise known as a scene but generally less structured.

Shibari is A western name for Kinbaku, a type of bondage originating in Japan and characterized by extremely elaborate and intricate rope patterns, often used to restrain the subject and stimulate the subject by compressing the breasts or genitals. The aesthetics are considered to be very important.

Siderodromophilia: A fetish for trains. Often involves having sex while on a train.

Singletail: A whip with a single lash and requires skill and training to use properly.

Sissy: A male sub who uses feminization and dressing as a girl to reach a different emotional or mental state.

Sitophilia: A fetish for food. Often involves incorporating food into sexual foreplay.

Slave: A submissive partner who has an ongoing relationship with a dominant master.

Slime Fetish: A fetish for slimy substances, which often take the form of tentacles. Related to wet and messy fetishes and splashing.

Snakewhip: A small singletail whip that does not have a bullwhip’s rigid handle and has a cracker attached to a fall.

Sneezing Fetish: A fetish for watching others sneeze, usually while naked.

Snowballing: Kissing another with a mouth full of cum and transferring it to them.

Soft Limits: An activity limit that is more flexible than a hard limit. It might be an act that a person hesitates to perform or is scared to engage in but may be willing to try.  

Snuff: A paraphilia that centres around the fantasy of killing or being killed. 

Somnophilia: A fetish for asleep or unconscious sex partners.

Sounding: The act of inserting something into the urethra to inflict a mixture of pleasure and pain. Derived from the medical practice of removing blockage and clearing up urination issues. Often performed by using medical-grade sounding rods made of steel. Sounding enthusiasts have branched out, using a variety of objects, including seemingly painful and harmful objects and toothbrushes or glass.

Spotter: A person who monitors the submissive’s safety in a scene, most commonly used for complex bondage and suspension scenes. 

Spectrophobia: A fetish involving the fantasy of having sex with ghosts.

Sploshing: Splashing watery foods on oneself or a partner as an act of foreplay or for sexual gratification.

Squashing: A fetish for being squashed by another partner.

SSC: This stands for keeping activities Safe, Sane and Consensual. The BDSM community stresses making sure that everyone feels happy and fulfilled in only experiencing the pain and activities they desire with actual and long-lasting harm.

Stigmatophilia: A fetish for body piercings.

Stuffing: A fat fetish in which a person eats or is made to eat, to the point of physical pain.

Sub Drop: An emotional condition following intense BDSM play that may involve a variety of emotions from sadness and clinginess to anger, can happen immediately after play or hours after play and can often be prevented by immediate aftercare from a session.

Submissive, sub: One who derives sexual pleasure from yielding control to a dominant partner.

Subspace: A dreamlike or trance like state of peace that may be accompanied by feelings of security, safety and floating thoughts that a submissive can feel while engaged in a BDSM scene.

Swinging: Non-monogamous recreational sex with the consent, knowledge and often reciprocal participation of one’s partner. This often does not include a romantic relationship with the swinging partner and can be just one night, at a swinging party, event, or otherwise one-off act.

Switch: A person who will assume either a top or a bottom role in a BDSM scene.

Symphorphilia: A fetish for disasters or car wrecks, particularly watching or causing them.

T

Tantalolagnia: A fetish for being sexually teased.

Taphephilia: A fetish for being buried alive.

Tease and Denial: Keeping another person aroused to keep them in a continual state of anticipatory tension or heightened sensitivity.

Technophilia: A fetish for technology, which usually centres around cyborgs, robots, and sex machines.

Telephonicophilia: A fetish for phone sex or dirty talk.

TENS Unit: A device that applies electrical currents through pads affixed to the skin, often used in the medical community to relieve pain by blocking impulses through the nerves. Stands for Transconductance Electrical Nerve Stimulation.

Tentacle Fetish: A fetish for tentacles, often depicted in hentai or other forms of animated erotica.

Teratophilia: A fetish for deformed or monstrous people.

Thesauromania: A fetish for collecting women’s clothes. This usually involves collections of panties or undergarments.

Tickle Torture: A form of BDSM in which a submissive partner is tickled, often while being bound.

Tickling Fetish: A fetish for being tickled or for tickling submissive partners.

Timophilia: A fetish for wealth.

Toilet: A bottom that wishes to be used for toilet-related activities.

Top: The person who performs the BDSM acts in a scene.

Topping From the Bottom: When a bottom tries to control a scene even though it was agreed that the top would be in charge.

Total Power Exchange (TPE): A relationship where a subgrants full and complete control, authority and decision making power to their Dom/Domme, the most extreme form of 24/7.

Transformation Fetish, TF: A fetish for transforming or changing people into other people, objects, or creatures. This sexual fantasy is often limited to depictions in hentai and other forms of animated porn. However, some body-modification enthusiasts try to physically transform themselves into non-human creatures.

Transgendered Having a gender that does not match one born with genitalia. A binary gender system may include surgical, hormonal, or nonhormonal changes that result in a gender identity different from the one assigned at birth.

Transexual: A person who has strong desires to become the opposite of their birth sex may undergo chemical treatments or surgery to change their appearance.

Transvestite: A person who behaves or dresses in a manner generally associated with the opposite sex – not necessarily indicating their sexual partner preference.

Tribadism, Tribbing: An act of two women rubbing their vulvas together (slang for scissoring, clit-clattering, clam jousting, tacos, cookies, pumpkin doughnuts, gash mashing).

Trichophilia: A fetish for hair.

Trick: The person one hooks up with for sex or play, like a fuck buddy who probably isn’t a long term partner.

Troilism: 1. Threesome. 2. A fetish for threesomes or watching your partner have sex with another person.

Troll: A person who uses online resources primarily as a source for prospective partners may pretend they are experienced in BDSM when they are not.

Tripsolagnophilia: A fetish for getting or giving massages.

24 – 7: A D/s relationship where the dominant partner controls nearly all aspects of a submissive partner’s life, according to terms negotiated in advance and can involve a contract based on agreed-upon details.

U

Underwear Fetish: A fetish for underwear. This usually involves men who like to smell, wear, or collect unwashed panties.

Unicorn: the elusive bi-female willing to join a couple for the MFF threesome.

Urethra Play: Inserting objects into the urethra to inflict a mixture of pleasure and pain.

Urolagnia: A fetish for watching others drink urine.

Urophilia: A fetish for being urinated on or for urinating on another.

Ursusagalmatophilia: A fetish for teddy bears. Also, a fetish for dressing up in animal costumes. A form of plushophilia, which is a fetish for stuffed animals.

Urtication: A BDSM practice uses nettles to sting a partner’s skin, causing them to develop hives. The practice was once used to treat paralyzed body parts.

V

Vanilla: Used by people in the BDSM community to label sexual behaviour that doesn’t involve kink.

Vicarphilia: A fetish for living vicariously through others. Often involves listening to other people’s sexcapades.

Vincilagnia: A fetish for being bound or tied up. Often involves a desire to feel at the mercy of another.

Violet Wand: A device used for electrical play that contains a high-voltage coil and several interchangeable electrodes most commonly made of glass and filled with a glass that glows a brilliant colour and causes a static electricity discharge that can be intense and used to stimulate another often in a painful sense.

Vomit Fetish: Any fetish involving vomit. These include being vomited on, watching others vomit, or forcing oneself to vomit.

Vore, Voraphilia: A fetish for being eaten alive or eating another person who is still alive. A sexualized version of cannibalism.

Voyeur, Voyeurism: A fetish for spying on others, particularly their sexual activities.

W

Wartenberg Wheel: A little metal pinwheel lined with spikes that can be run over a partner’s erogenous zones for stimulation.

Water Sports: Any type of sex play that involves urine or enemas.

Wax Play: When the top drips hot wax onto the bottom.

Wet & Messy Fetish: A broad spectrum of fetishistic acts involves making a sex partner wet and messy with various substances. 

White Knight: A dominant who desires to rescue damsels in distress, submissives who may have unmet emotional needs from childhood, relationships or rape.

X

Xenophilia: A fetish for strangers or foreign objects.

Y

Yeastiality: A fetish for bread. Often involves having sex with warm dough.

Yiffing: Sexual acts involving stuffed animals.

Yoni: A Hindu term used for the vagina.

Z

Zelophilia: A fetish for feeling jealous.

Zentai: A fetish in which participants wear Zentai suits—skintight suits made from thin, stretchy fabric—to have anonymous sex with other Zentai enthusiasts or participate in some anonymous dry humping.

Zipper: An arrangement of clothespins or spring clamps tied along a length of cord which is placed on the body and then yanked off.

Zoophilia: A fetish for acting, dressing, and being treated like animals. It may involve walking on all fours, wearing a collar, and eating out of pet bowls.

Zoosexual: A fetish for animals.

PLEASURE UNCENSORED LOGO

JOIN to receive exclusive Kinky Tips, Entertainment, and Giveaways every week!

PLEASURE UNCENSORED LOGO

JOIN to receive exclusive Kinky Tips, Entertainment, and Giveaways every week!